Feeling good about you.

Last night. *snickers*
Last night was nothing short of amazing..
I wake up longing for whatever it is that you do to me.
Love at it's finest.
I never feel used with you.
If I'm used it's in the right way.
The tone in your voice or maybe the way you call me name.
What could it be?
Or is it just you.
I pray with you.
Eat with you.
talk to you.
walk with you.
sleep with you.
cry with you.
feel for you.
I'd kill for you. *a spider of course*
What I'm saying is that you give me reason to stay focused/sane.
Spirituality is what's most important to me.
You teach me.
I annoy you.
You correct me.
I joke around.
You put me in my place.
I sing loud and obnoxiously.
You become silent.
I never understand why.
Nonetheless, You love me with everything that I do. That's the way that it's suppose to be. Love through God can be so strong, and with him all things are possible. You never really know what love is until you find someone who can give you everything you NEED appose to what you want. And you do that for me without any reservations. I remember when you said we could never be friends well, lol You're officially my Best friend and I wouldn't trade you for the world! <3

Granted

I've been a follower

For longer than I've been a lover of you
And if you think it's not long enough
to shake me
then you don't know me yet



I fall. Fast

That's the easy part

But I have trouble getting back up

And dusting off the sick feeling

that I get every time I think about

leaving here.



It's what I do best.
It's the one thing that drew us
together with picket fence dreams
and it's my one flaw
that you take for granted.



I take a lot of things for granted.

Loving, for example.



This is not the easy part
It takes so much more to stay
than to go
And I've been going for years now,
wandering and waiting
and calmly expecting change to happen
It always comes
rushing in like a bullhorn on full speed.



I'm always ready for the blow



I wish that I could say that this is it for me
I wish that I could keep my composure
when future plans come into play
I wish that I didn't think that everything
comes so easily
That I deserve everything that I want



I wish I didn't want so much



And that my bones didn't ache for sea sand





I'm jealous of the fixtures we've inherited
Mostly because
I want to feel the same salinity on my cheeks
and something other than snow on my eyelids







I still love. I still wish. I still dream.

I just do it in monotone these days.

And I don't mean to make you think

That it's all because I'm unhappy

Just know

That there is something in you that

Makes me say stay

That tells me I have no choice

But to root myself in you

And if you're here, so am I

Baby Brit.

Back when I was Daddy's lil tookie lol. <3 Memories are what keeps me sane often times.

I miss you Dad.

It's been 9 months and I miss you like crazy Dad. I've always had a lot of unanswered questions but I've talked to GOD about it and it's in his hands. I love you, I couldn't say it enough the last time I saw you :) I pray for you and my extended family just about every night. Rest in peace Poppa Pete. No more stress, no more worries. You can finally live & rest comfortably. <3

Untitled

Inevitably... there are things I miss
and things I regret
and promises I can't quite put my
finger on, but must surely be broken
There are spaces between
my clenched jaw and fists
that want to be held by
someone, anyone
who will sit and listen to my
unbearable silence
There are questions that won't give in
and answers that won't budge
There is heaviness, unavoidable weight
that sits and multiplies
the more I try to ignore it
There is so much pressure now
that you can see the buckling
under my pen and heavy fingers
There is no ending
There is only a continuation
when I least suspect its resurrection
Nothing ever dies
Nothing is ever finished
Nothing is ever new
So I see the same dream, always
the one where I'm chasing my selves
to get us all writing on the same page
to spread out the heaviness
((like nails to the back))

Tell her, when she comes, to bring a remedy..

Yes. I bet it stung.
like forcing those last words
to finally slip from your tongue
Don't worry, love
You are no more or less broken
or resilient
than you pretended to be
Before I met you, I was known
by some other girl's name.
You know, the one that made you
feel like you had to fix me
and that one that convinced you
that you could. Someday.
So you see I'm just the same sad song
on repeat and I know how it feels
Believe me. Or don't.
The endings never made sense to you anyway
so you stuffed my
book of poems inside your
book of questions and expected
me to give you all the answers
like they haven't been there all along..
But what you've been reading is
all half-hope and half-lies--
the white kind. They seemed
purer. Or simpler.
But I've never done simple,
never wanted the neatly trimmed
forgiveness and solid lines
I'm attracted to the complications
that formed the boulder sitting
on the tip of your tongue.
I wasn't the only one to sting you
wasn't the only one to leave you
in your dust of mourning
and I won't be the last
So when you ask me why I'm running
I will probably say I'm a fan of history
and I don't want to
break the pattern
'cause it hurts too much to
rip the stitches, love.

Dude.

you're awesome :o)

Dang, who can I vent to about my mother..
Nobody understands like you do.
This whole night BLOWS, *insert cuss word here*

I..

I come in peace.

Feeling like F it all.

Ever feel like you've emotionally shut down? That's how I feel right now. I don't have thick skin and I take everything to heart.. Guess it's my choice to pick and choose what matters and what doesn't.

Quotes

Distance means so little, when the person means so much.

Confession

When I miss you, I stalk you.

... I'm not quite obsessed but umm, I miss you..


Plays Sam Cooke..



At first I thought it was infatuation
But woo, it's lasted so long
Now I find myself wanting
To marry you and take you home
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You, you, you, you send me
I know you send me
I know you send me
Honest you do



More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/you_send_me_lyrics_sam_cooke.html
All about Sam Cooke: http://www.musictory.com/music/Sam+Cooke

Random guy: Why the fukk do you have a cell phone..

if all you do is text??...
iz that like the new trend wit females now? niggas gotta go thru this long ass drawn out ass process of textin the bitch for about a month & a half, until SHE feels like we can now go past a texting conversation... its the lamest shit EVER. we might as well go back to 1999 when we had two way pagers then... since a bitch aint tryna talk to u. im just sayin... communication is going down the drain. if u think im finna be finger fuckin my phone everytime i wanna talk to u.... u trippin. come on now, get it together ladies.. itz easier to knock a bitch talkin than it iz textin...
wtf iz texting??
what part of the game iz that?
u cant really serenade a bitch if u typing letters...
obviously u not a player if you think this shit is cool.



Me: o.O
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Good Dick?

So... I'm watching "Good Dick" and this movie is WILD! It's been about 22mins since the start of the movie and I'm like WOOOOOOOOOOW! No it's not all overly sexed up or anything, but this guy works at a video store and he's like OBSESSED with one of the customers... *MAJOR side-eye* LOL. This weird freakin guy sleeps in his car OUTSIDE of her building.. Eek *screams to the freakin top of my lungs* randomly comes to her apartment door and tries to talk to her, making up lies just to get into her apartment. This chick must be off her rocker!!!! It doesn't even seem like they know each others names... And yes all of the DOT DOT DOTS are necessary.. He eventually gets into her place and it's kinda weird the first time but nothing extreme happens. The second time he gets into her place he ask to watch an erotica movie with her which is the type of movies she would buy from his store, she declines LOL. #pause This $h!+ is weird, but I must say it's kind of a turn on because it's different and I like different O.o So around the third time he comes over they finally watch the movie together and he claims he doesn't like it... (DID I MENTION that he watched her masturbate at the beginning of the movie, so this guy followed her HOME and hasn't missed at night outside of or in her house since. Woooooooo Nelly! ) The forth time they eat ice cream pops and watch more movies and they talk about how big the guys cock is on the screen, LOL. Cock sounds so weird to me, kinda makes me feel like a little child inside, hahaha. Anywho, They make a bet that if his cock is bigger then the guy(8in.) on the screen that he gets to sleep in her bed. *Dun dun dunnnnnnnn* IT IS! so they sleep in the same bed, act all weird, he recites some poetry or tells her a story idk, but eventually she gets up in the morning and takes a shower and while shes bathing, he masturbates in her bed. Ok, Ok, OKAY! I'm takin aback BECAUSE it all doesn't make sense. Why let a random guy come into your house? let him sleep on your couch? let him watch erotica movies with you? then sleep in your bed? Yep this girl is officially considered "Creepy". Some of these situations are understandable but the rest are just down right CRAZY! I wanna know why hasn't she slept with him yet? is she a-sexual, lesbian or possibly she just doesn't get down like that. *Shrugs* (Watches movie until something interesting I like happens) :). *5 minutes go by* She's a loner and all she does is stay home watch erotica and masturbate, and he doesn't understand why.. Ha sounds all to familiar. She's pretty much well off and doesn't work and he stays in her apartment with her. He gets her out of her place for a first and tries to get her to enjoy life. The type of movies she watches aren't even penetrating and or anything to get aroused off of. This chick just needs to get laid! Honestly I'm up to the part where nothing else can be explained you guys just have to see the movie.

I LOVED it <3. Soooo up my alley of movies.
Hope yall enjoyed my commentary :)
Until next time

-B

okay.

I HATE subliminal messages.
If you have anything to say, SAY IT TO ME!
Seriously?


how old are we? WTH


then when you talk to the person about it, everything is supposedly fine..
I'm really gonna start letting you know where you could go.